Monday, November 13, 2006

We're Going To The SPCD!

Things had been calm for a few days before I received the SECOND note.

This note was neatly folded and left under my pillow with a chocolate. I thought the chocolate was a nice touch even though I have acid reflux and can't eat chocolate. It was still a nice gesture.

This time the note was printed on a pretty blue flowered stationary and, again, written in the same beautiful calligraphy. I made a mental note that I absolutely HAD to find out who was so talented and where did they learn their calligraphy? Plus, this note also contained the most wondrous scent. Who was the perfume designer?

Once again, this note was addressed "Confidential - To Linda - For Your Eyes Only!"

It simply said:


We know you love him dearly!
And, he is your husband of many, many, many years!
And, we guess, technically he's - OUR DAD!
But, "SOMETHING HAS TO BE DONE ABOUT HIM!"
He is becoming obsessed with the electric meter!"

It went on further.

Do you know how many times a day this past summer he went out to look at the electric meter?

Do you know that sometimes when he looks at it he stays there for a long period of time as if he's in a trance from the spinning meter - all the while mumbling incoherent curse words?

When he comes out of his trance he starts cursing, swearing, stomping, and jumping up and down. Like a maniac!!!!! Like a mad leprechaun with smoke coming out his ears!!!!!

He then makes a beeline into the house and the next thing we know it's boiling in here.

HE SHUT OFF THE AIR CONDITIONERS!!!

We simply cannot have him doing this with the heat in the winter. The results would be catastrophic.

Our hands are tied. Unless someting is done you leave us with no alternative. We will have no choice but to take this to "SPCD."

Well, now I knew where the note was coming from.

I still didn't know who was writing the note in that wonderful, wonderful calligraphy. Or, where they got the money to buy the stationary in the first place? Or, who the perfume designer was? Or, what the "SPCD" was.

All I knew was they were getting desperate and I had to do something right away. Bad news all around.

However, the good news was that I knew the note was coming from someone in "The Dollie Storage Room."

You see, the electric meter is right outside the "The Dollie Storage Room" and the dolls are all well positioned to see it and my husband's maniacal behavior.

I had to admit he really was becoming obsessed with the electric meter and the weather. Retirement was getting the better of him.

I thought to myself, "He needs a JOB!!!! Something to occupy his mind besides the electric bill and the weather."

I started to wring my hands and with the tension could feel a "hot flash" coming on. This wasn't good - I HATE hot flashes!

And, yes something HAD to be done.

However, it was going to take delicate diplomacy. My husband versus my "dollie" children - the very essence of me! Hmmm.......

Did this then mean it was going to be a confrontation between my husband and the "dollies?"

If so, WHO WOULD WIN? Would there be a winner? And, what would the outcome be?

I only hoped it would not come down to a choice between them or my husband. And, what was the "SPCD?"

I knew 'd better try to find that out right away. I surmised it had to do with a "governmental" agency and I knew I didn't need that.

So, I entered "SPCD" into my "Google" browser window. The results were surprising. I'd never heard of such an agency!

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